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| The Sphinx on the Escarpment Trail - Southeastern Section
from the Catskill Mountaineer
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My
earliest memory of holy—
a
whole, sensual and spiritual
presence
without boundaries—was upon
a
rock—a boulder really—world-sized, high
and
smooth enough that I had to lean on
arms
braced behind to keep from sliding off
and
in the vertigo of adjustment
in
that instant of disorientation
my
vision shifted and wonder replaced
my
fear. But I returned to earth. And from
the
descriptions of holiness given
to
me then, I didn’t recognize it.
Holiness
was located in buildings,
religion
classes, objects, names, prayers
and
language to memorize and repeat.
When
did breath cling to those lessons?
I
don’t remember when the word God first
lived
for me, though I knew what I was s’posed
to
feel. I think I felt something shift once
in
puppy love. Poetry erupted.
But
it wasn’t until protests against
the
war that I integrated with night,
wasn’t
until drumming with women ‘round
bonfires
that I remembered my first boulder.
Holiness
embraces physically—
oh
yes—whether in dance or sitting still,
whether
alone or in community,
whether
on a proclaimed high holy day
or
in moments of awareness. It is.
Accessible.
If busy-ness doesn’t
displace
it and if I don’t misplace it.
Breath
is holy. Waking is holy and
touching
is holy. And—primed by pagan
ritual
and desire for peace—I heard
God
speak, finally, and met Jesus who
became
a go-between for me. A Way.
I
call that way holy, delight to walk
in
it intentionally, but accept
that
much of the time I am not aware.
I
also accept that God loves and holds
me
even when I am inattentive.
Excuse
me while I unfold sixty years.
I
thought it would be easy to explain
holiness,
but despite all that is said
and
written about it in many faiths—
I
know you have to experience it
yourself,
oh yes, even in a mystic
inhale,
catching your breath when it’s that real.
(April is International Poetry Month.)
My blog poems are rough drafts.
Please respect my copyright.
© 2017 Susan L. Chast
'Holiness embraces physically—' and I also believe that one has to experience it...Truth so poetically and most beautifully expressed..
ReplyDeleteThe phenomenology of 'holiness' is as diverse as human experience itself. For me, the sense of holiness arises from a consciousness of the spiritual aspect of human existence. Hence, ....'Holiness embraces physically—' Totally agree!! It has to be thought, felt, experienced and expressed in the nuances! Beautiful poem, Susan. Loved it, absolutely!
ReplyDeleteSusan, for me, these days, which we observe, as holy, are ones branded with pain and grief. Whether, by my dad, or later, by my younger brother and his abusive behaviour towards, over the years.
ReplyDeleteThis is such marvelous work, Susan. It was a pleasure to read.
ReplyDeleteDeep and thoughtful, beautifully written! It resonates with me.
ReplyDeleteI am a believer too. I believe we have different paths to the Lord. Thank you for sharing yours. The Arms are open.
ReplyDeleteThis is a glorious Read! I love your boulder moment. I had a similar moment, meditating on a mountain at dawn one Easter moment. I heard angelic singing and had a vision of the planet, blue and green......sigh. I especially love your fantastic last stanza.
ReplyDeleteHow often we find God in the natural world rather than the proselytizing of priests. We should not be concerned we feel this way as we must search for God any way we can. What a great read this was Susan.
ReplyDeleteSusan, what a wonderful description of holiness. Yes, I do think we all learn what we are supposed to feel, but to really feel it physically, to really feel it with that 'mystic inhale' (no matter what the specifics of one's faith) is a glorious and miraculous thing! Sometimes it takes those 'sixty years' to figure it out! Blessings.
ReplyDeleteI agree. Holiness is something you have to experience. I liked the line: "Holiness embraces physically".
ReplyDeleteI think I totally relate to the boulder moment., feeling the wonderment, the truth, the infinite.... I couldn't find anything new to say, so didn't link up to the prompt but would love to share an earlier post on the topic.. https://phantomroad.wordpress.com/2016/10/08/08-oct-2016/
ReplyDeleteAlmost impossible to describe what is spiritual ..a very individual experience, I agree wholly.
A lovely unfolding that kept me enthralled through every word. Although I think we do have to experience the mystery for ourselves, you shared your experiences in a palpable way to give us a strong sense of it.
ReplyDeleteI agree that mysticism is an important part of belief. It is an individual experience and an intimate communication with the Divine.It all takes a very long time to process so there may have been some value in those excruciatingly boring religion lessons after all:)
ReplyDeleteI don't think we are meant to understand all the things we are taught initially. It takes experience and boulder moments to make sense of it all when the puzzle pieces begin to fit. I enjoyed this poem enormously and also the prompt. Thank you.
Luv this aspect of holiness in your poem
ReplyDelete"I also accept that God loves and holds
me even when I am inattentive."
Much love...
Yes, holiness is hard to explain. And, yes, you have to experience it. Sadly, many do not.
ReplyDeleteindeed holiness is the experience of it in solitude and silence and in various circumstances..though days are ordained as holy and observed as such...thanks for sharing
ReplyDelete