Blindness
Again I tell you, it is
easier for a camel
to squeeze through the eye of a needle
than for a rich person to get into the
kingdom of God. ~Matthew 19-24
to squeeze through the eye of a needle
than for a rich person to get into the
kingdom of God. ~Matthew 19-24
In the heat of judgment,
she decides to leave her AC on at 85 degrees—
a compromise between privilege and poverty
and one not too uncomfortable
for after the pool
In the relative cool of evening,
she decides to write a poem about privilege—
a substitute for standing in at Maggie’s house
where Maggie faces those repossessing
her only home
In the water of one fire hydrant,
she fills her pail like everyone
else—
a necessity in the growing drought
which finally births equality after words
and honey fail
In the light under her bushel,
a private alternative to the market place—
she notes with hands shaking
that common plastic buckets are lighter
than her metal one
In the alternating light and shade of daytime,
she decides to give away clothes and food—
a sad kindness in a land where promises of rain
fail to materialize under the blind eyes
of sun, moon, and God.
of sun, moon, and God.
 |
| From Jan Morris's new book Manhatten '45 |
Written hastily for "Poetics: Whatever the Weather" at dVerse today. The only revision this poem allowed was (1) changing past tense to present tense and (2) making a passive verb structure active. I hope to feel lighter myself when the heat lessens tomorrow.
Copyright © 2012 S.L.Chast
Sent in to Nain Rouge
A fine poem indeed, compasionate and yet calls us to task, to examine our blindness. I generally find it helpful to look outside myself to get assistance in seeing my blindspots. You also ask important questions about the meaning and measure of this ethical issue.
ReplyDeleteThank you for seeing the compassion as well as the moralizing. I seem to be going through a judgmental phase. This is almost me, of course, doing almost nothing compared to what I used to do to make a difference in the world.
DeleteOh dear - so sorry about the heat. A weighty poem, heavy with the kind of quotidian suffering that this kind of weather, and difficulty begets. Very well done. k.
ReplyDeleteThank you, K. Heat and judgement take on a weightiness at times that perhaps is unwarranted. I love the word "quotidian."
DeleteWell said, and thought-provoking, Susan.
ReplyDeleteThe challenge was good!
DeleteWe have become a world of have and have nots and the gap keeps on growing wider by the day. This is a wonderful tale about someone seeing what they can do for others once their eyes and, hearts are opened. Lovely prose Susan.
ReplyDeleteThat's exactly it. Thank you.
DeleteIn this modern world, it's difficult to conceive what it means to live by any other means than what the system as designed offers. I just heard a news program about how many companies went down when Amazon cloud went off line. I also just tweeted an article about what a power outage means. Learning other ways of dealing with our lives' necessities comes home when mother nature has her way. Your poem is a sober, sane reminder of that.
ReplyDeleteAH yes. And in a sense she is me, tho I am not rich. The comfort I have seems like wealth though when I too learn just what's going on.
DeleteMagnificent piece, Susan! I love the metaphor running throughout, the poverty and heat. The scripture at the top is one of my favorites, too!
ReplyDeleteThank you again, Laurie, for a note on the metaphor and verse.
DeleteThis poem is strong and the language has a nice rhythm. I love how you pulled us through to come to rest at the hard knot of the conclusion. Well done. I am equally inspired by your profile. I too aspire to "a commitment to boldness, to talking out my thoughts, to performing as I used to from instinct to instinct." Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteNice! "to come to rest at the hard knot of the conclusion." I did indeed place the blame above, didn't I? Thank you for the comments and a little about who you are!
DeleteThoughtful write on the line between privilege and poverty ~
ReplyDeleteI specially find that last stanza poignant and heart felt ~ We strive to do what we can to help others in greater need ~
Happy day ~
Yes, we do. I think I could do more. I think this poem is my apology. Thank you once again for visiting and commenting.
DeleteI love the language and wordplay throughout the poem. The revision undoubtedly makes it stronger. The inclusion of the character Maggie builds both tension and compassion in the reading of the poem, and the conclusion showers charity which both cools and soothes. Exceptionally fine write!
ReplyDeleteWow! Lovely comment--a poem in itself. Thank you.
DeleteThe last verse is stunning. There is so much poverty; it is good to read a poem about someone who decided to take action.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mary.
DeleteWell I think this is a real treat for an off the cuff, written in a hurry piece. Really nice use of metaphor and generally the overwhelming drudgery that comes with every step you take when it's just too damn hot. A fine read indeed.
ReplyDeleteYes: "the overwhelming drudgery that comes with every step you take when it's just too damn hot." Very perceptive! Thanks for reading and commenting.
Deletereally a fine piece susan..i love writing in present tense and active voice....i think it puts the reader right into the poem...ugh on the tale you weave...you really capture her...and her plight...to turn one out in this heat gets my ire up a bit....and having lived through the heat without power this week...i can feel it...
ReplyDeleteI truly felt for you and others in this heat. I turned it into an oppression, I think. Thank you, as always, for the comment.
DeleteVery well done!
ReplyDeletegrin!
DeleteSo much to think about in this very thoughtful poem- a stark contrast between those who have and have not (in material terms of course), but that the weather doesn't care, it is unrelenting, it doesn't care about personal position .... Much like life.....I thought this was great, and a much different take on the prompt... V much enjoyed.
ReplyDelete'Twas a fine prompt, with so many suggestions! And the weather--the climate--may cause some change, but it doesn't care and it doesn't act--my one of two major disagreements with Shakespeare.
Delete..which finally birth equality after words and honey fail is the key sentence for me here... things change when we start acting differently... really like this susan
ReplyDeleteClaudia, thank you for your careful readings! Drought--actual and moral--horrifies me. This is indeed the central verse. And in some way, the next poem is about fire--fire next time--although, of course, this and that are both love poems.
DeleteWe over here only know of poverty and cold. Possibly a touch more dangerous. Personally I have experience of poverty and war. Can't begin to think about those in far-off lands that have to try and cope with poverty and floods or fire at the moment. You placed this glimpse of personal disaster in a prism.
ReplyDeleteThank you . . . and thank you for commenting on Truth and Poetry Part Three--a powerful addition to the dialogue I have yet to respond to. I think you can use poverty under cold conditions in the same way as drought and heat. How cold does the climate, the environment, have to get before . . . ? I fear aging into a more preachy person than I want to be, but I enjoyed creating this "prism" which, in a way, can be seen as a poem about love and faith.
DeleteSusan,
ReplyDeleteObviously much thought went into this, that's wonderful! Many types face the vagaries of the weather. And since the weather doesn't discriminate it's to each his own. Great write, Ma'am!
Hank
Thank you, Hank!
DeleteIf I wrote hastily and got the result you got, I would write as quickly as possible. The poem is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Myrna. Don't you find the words just pour out at times?
DeleteVery sharp writing. I love
ReplyDelete"which finally births equality after words
and honey fail."
Thank you. I was thinking of "You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."
DeleteSo compassionate and original.....
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sreeja.
Delete